Two-fer
I didn't even know I was pregnant. All of the normal indicators just weren't there. I wasn't sick at all. However, I was extremely tired. I thought it was because of my first full-time job since graduating college, which included a commute from Ogden to Salt Lake City. I was so very tired, I would sleep in my car during break. Then one day, while sitting dutifully in my cubicle, I was struck with the overwhelming smell of all the lunches being eaten and/or prepared in the office. It was so awful. I thought I might puke. Tired and and aversion to smells...
Could I be pregnant?
A home test revealed, yes.
During my first Doctor's appointment, I had an ultrasound that revealed I was already 13 weeks pregnant.
"Congratulations," said the doctor. "You're done with your first trimester."
Done with the my first trimester? That was easy! But just because you have an easy pregnancy, does not mean you'll have an easy delivery.
A week before my due date, on a Saturday, my husband and I had dinner at Chili's. I knew our lives would soon change and eating out in the future would require babysitters and planning ahead. So we lived it up and got an appetizer. Yum!
On Sunday morning I was struck with a stabbing pain in my lower right side. I threw up. A lot. I guessed it was the Chili con Queso. So much for indulging in an appetizer. I couldn't even keep water down. I stayed home from church and writhed in pain presumably from food poisoning. Sunday night the pain in my side got worse and I didn't sleep. I was worried now. Really worried. I could feel the baby move and I felt that she was okay, but me...I wasn't okay. Something was wrong with me. Something awful. I woke Jake up at dawn and told him to drive me to the hospital.
"On a scale of 1 to 10, what is your pain level?"
"Ten," I told the nurses. "It's a TEN."
All the monitors indicated that our baby was fine. As to the pain in my side, they could only guess since they couldn't give me an MRI. Their first guess was my appendix was about to pop and the second guess was my gall bladder. Either way, they couldn't diagnose or fix the problem with a baby in the way. I was scheduled for a c-section immediately...which turned out to be 12 hours after I got to the hospital. Apparently there were other people who needed the Operating Room more urgently than me for the entire day.
Around 6pm, I entered the OR. Nobody expects to have their fist baby via c-section. I didn't know what it would be like. The air was cold. Ice cold. The walls were white and the metal shiny. After sticking a giant needle down my spine, I laid down on the stainless steel slab in the middle of the room. I was told I would go numb from my neck down, and I might not even feel myself breathing. I threw up. My husband was next to my head holding a bowl and being supportive as always. The whole day had crawled by so slowly. And after waiting all day for this moment, it all seemed to be happening so fast. I cried. I was scared. I looked at the blue sheet that separated me from the doctors in anticipation. I'm so glad for that sheet. I honestly think it's best that I NOT see the sharp knives and cutting that's involved in the procedure. I surely couldn't handle it.
I heard her cry.
They held up my perfect baby girl and she was healthy and LOUD! They swaddled her up and gave her to my husband to hold and he put her close to my face. I couldn't believe I was a mother. Right now. She was precious and finally quiet. Where did she get red hair?! She was so beautiful. I couldn't wait to hold her.
"Time to go," the nurse said as she ushered my new baby and husband out of the room.
"Wait! No! Why are they leaving? Where are they going?!" I sobbed hysterically.
"We have to sterilize the room for the next procedure. A surgeon has been paged," she informed me.
Procedure? I turned my attention back to the blue sheet and heard the doctors talking to each other.
"Definitely appendicitis. Just look at it."
It was my appendix. And they were talking about me as if I wasn't there. How bad was it? How long did I have to wait with my guts wide open to the world before they would take it out?
"What's happening?!" I shouted over the sheet, "Did it rupture?"
And that's when I knew that I would die here. I never even got to hold my baby, sing her lullabies or kiss her cheeks. I watched them walk out of the room and I would never see them again. My cries echoed off the hallow walls of the room. Here in front of strangers, during an emergency c-section, I would die. I was engulfed in a horrific panic. And apparently, that shows up on the monitor.
"Your heart rate has spiked and I'm going to need to give you something to relax a little bit," the anesthesiologist calmly said to me.
He lied. Everything went black. He put me under completely. I don't remember the surgeon coming or having my appendix removed. It was probably for the best. I woke up on the way to my room where Jake, my new baby and several members of our family were waiting. I was told I was gone for more than an hour. It felt like five minutes.
I finally held my baby. I made a baby and she made me a mother. She had a round face and plump cheeks. I lived. We both survived the whole ordeal. I couldn't 't believe it. We were both going to be okay. I was flooded with relief and inexplicable happiness.
I got a 2 for 1 deal. They can keep my appendix. I'll keep my Sophie.
